3rd-degree

ahhhh its been so long since i last posted on here i guess when ur using a journal then u dont have the energy to keep posting on different sites well everythings been micky mouse lately im happier than iv ever been in my entire life iv met some fantastic people and i still see some old friends but all in all iv been goin out tones and having the time of my life problem is my body cant keep up and its dieing on me lol oh well the price you pay my course is going great and families all good iv become a really bruswick st boy and I love it going to bars on week nights and house partys on the weekends siting round listing to music and

why does life always repeat itself and why do i always end up lyeing in bed trying to fight the nightmares why do i try when i know tomorow will just be the same 12 fucken scares and i still dont learn 12 reasons to not wake up tomorow a new year and an old story just regurgitated once again how many more times can i do this i have no energy left life dosnt bring smiles and laughter i can feel my emotions physicaly like im sick and can feel the vomit in the back of my thoat my body shakeing as if im standing in the rain my mind a blur of pain unable to focus on the keys why does it always end the same lies and deception left of

i herd a song just the other day and it stuck with me i found myself singing it in the car and repeating the lyrics in my head if for no other reason i thought i would post the lyrics as a reminder a day to mark amoung others a day of to much alkohole and a sore throat and a taste of stomic acid a day when time stoped and started just as suddenly a day when life repeated itself as it has so many times befor a day when i looked at my scars and made a choice a day when i sat by myself and a day when i sat with others a day with group hugs and laughter and a day that ended in a chocolate brown sheet bed beconing to torment me today wa